Nearly two years ago, my husband, Buck, and I decided to renovate our house. We’re finally in the last room. YAY!
Because we have furniture in the room, we have to do sections at a time. Meaning, we cut and pulled up the carpet and padding, then, I pulled up the staples and carpet strips and scraped and swept the floor. As you can see from the photo, Buck has to fix the subfloor where it got wet from the leak we had a while back. I was really hoping to get this much of the floor done, but our strength gave out and we had to call it a day.
This morning, I felt like someone beat me up in my sleep. Ever since my bout with a ruptured disc a few years ago, my back ain’t what it used to be when I jogged 20 miles a week. In plain English, it hurts like hell! And this floor thing is not at all what the doctor ordered. Plus, I have an anxiety disorder. And it’s not just my body falling apart. Oh, no. Buck’s knee swells and hurts him all the time. And he’s diabetic and has PTSD.
So, we’re either the dumbest two people on the planet or we’re a couple of masochists. Take your pick and we’d have to agree with either one.
In all fairness, though, we decided to renovate our house ourselves because it needed to be done and we don’t have the luxury (money) of having someone else do it for us. Plus, we were 71 when we started. Most people are either dead or in nursing homes by then, not on their hands and knees and climbing ladders renovating their homes.
During this anything-but-fun-process, I’ve sometimes treated God as my Fairy Godmother. Of course, I know better than to think He’s going to snap His fingers and poof! the carpets are up, the floor is down and all my furniture is back in its rightful place. But there were moments when my brain shut down and my heart screamed, Do it, Lord! Wave your magic wand and make all this madness disappear!
When I prayed for God’s help, He didn’t rip up one piece of carpet, pull up one single staple, or lay down one vinyl plank. He didn’t paint the walls or help me organize the mess we created. Nope! None of that. He could have. He’s God, after all. Heck, He created me from dust. Nothing is too much for Him.
But, He did help me. He gave me strength when I didn’t think I could move another inch. He dried my tears of anger and frustration. He sent me a family of Wrens on the back porch to help take my mind off the chaos and remind me that He is still near. Throughout this madness, He has been there cheering me on, telling me when I need to stop, and helping me to stay focused when the process gets distorted and my attitude gets twisted out of shape.
Today, I am tired. My body hurts. Buck’s body hurts. I wish we were done. I wish someone would come and finish it for us. But we’re closer to our dream today than we were yesterday. And in spite of my suffering and tiredness, God will give me the strength and dogged determination to finish!
If you’re in a hard place right now and can’t find your way through, God is always there ready and completely able to help you. It may not be the help you want, but it will be exactly what you need to keep going.